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You are the coin always lands on its edge.
You are the light that is on yellow.
You are the image in the menu, which has no similarity to the court.
A lot of paths open up before you and you take any.
A lot of life to offer itself to you and you live any.
I see it around me
you stand at the crossroads without a map, no sense of direction.
you see all the people and take all true things.
you want to do everything that you wanted to always do, but you do nothing.
Not because you can not, not because you lack the time
but because you're distracted. Distracted by
All that means nothing to you and anyone who means anything to you
I see it in everything
says everything inside you that you have to do something.
paralyzes everything inside you up and prevents you doing anything.
You stand and would rather sit, you sit and you would rather lie.
You sleep and you'd rather be awake.
You are awake and can not wait to finally sleep again.
your eyes you fall. Your eyes tear.
Your throat is dry and your lips are chapped.
I could be so much more than this
You are among people and'd like to own.
you alone and would like to be among people.
You are among people and you are alone with you.
None of them can tell you what you have to do.
None of them can tell you what you feel.
You can not say what you feel and you do not know what you want to feel.
you want to do everything, but you do nothing.
What you do not have to do but prevents you from doing do what you want, but do not.
I want to be so much more than this
But you do nothing.
The sun is shining, the birds are chirping and there is no damn good day.
not a good day to access the cemetery to be, if there are great days for it and yet you're here. You stand at his grave and intrusive smell freshly dug soil moist burn you in the nose, the last cover of the dead. The taste of rotting flesh fills your mouth. For three days. For three days the there and rots and you rot with him.
Back at the hotel you're sitting on the edge of the bed and stare at the yellow fringe-stained carpet, you dare not to go barefoot on it. He reminds you of Piss. Old dried piss in tunnels and side streets. You wonder why you stare at him and a short time later it falls back on you - you know the cracks and dents in the Ceiling already by heart, and the spots on the wallpaper make you too much to think about their origin.
You've wasted so many thoughts to piss that you go to the bathroom. You're done, rinse and go over to the sink, you wash your hands and face and always will be short, to determine whether the cracks run in your face or in the mirror. You come to the decision to see the cracks in your face.
you leave the hotel and drive at walking speed, the radio controlled down to unintelligible murmurs, all the roads along which you are rushed past, along with the bike. In far too low gear for a lot of high cadence with Bobby to stop by, meet the guys on the football field or to go to Jenny. You think of Jenny and wonder whether her breasts probably still could be so fantastic, as you have in mind - if any at all breasts could be as fantastic as Jenny's in your memory. meet short term beautiful thoughts to your entire body and beautiful breasts, you'd know it better not to bet you could have, for a moment to have been happy. But deep in the you know, to not be happy, not so long is the smell of earth in your nose.
step into the eighth time in the last seven days you the third floor of the police building, and run on the third office down the hall, at the desk in front of you winking at a young blonde with a strand of hair on the face and indicated with a nodding motion that you can enter Morrow's office.
you step by Aluminiumgerahmte glass door that bears the name of Detective Inspector Dave Morrow and closes it behind you. It must be mid-40s, early 50s, sits there behind his desk and he and his gray temples look at a stack of files. His eyes fix up through his glasses through and he says:
. "Our Wendy seems to have left something for them, Mr. Hamilton"
"The .? Nice to hear, but that's why I'm not here "Answerest du
" Sit down, Eric, why are you here today, "you sit in the chair at the desk of Mr. Morrow's opposite is, you look his face and erwiderst
"The same as yesterday, I would like to know what's new."
"And I must give you the same answer as yesterday, is it's an ongoing investigation and I am currently not entitled to information . about to give out "
you hit with your hand on the table and raising your voice to:
" And this crap do you want me now warmed up day by day dish again? Last week I was probably still outside, but now I'm in the middle, knee-deep in shit, so please give me something, anything! "
" I'm sorry, but I have nothing for you, Eric, we all feel here with you and it is not easy for us, but I can now be no more ... "
" That's crap and you know it! "
" Come 19h into the Towers. "
" What? "
" Then we can entertain us in peace. "
" Ok. "
" Have a nice day Mr. Hamilton. "dir Gets Detective Inspector Dave Morrow afterwards, as you rush towards the door.
"Thanks."
you see in passing, like you Wendy smiles at parting, she seems to have become nicer, since you had entered the office.
You step into your car, can approach the radio off and drive on the newsstand next to you to buy a newspaper. With the newspaper under his arm, you walk on the street and set up the Sundown Cafe, a table by the window, you spread the newspaper out in front of you, while Clarissa receives your order. You're not hungry and order you like the soup of the day, not knowing what these are, you were not thirsty and order a coffee with two sugars and a large dash of milk.
You rummage through the newspaper and find on page 3:
"cop killer? - Police still without a trace. could
Even a week after the sudden death of Chief Inspector William John Hamilton, the police no evidence of a 'hot educate track \u0026lt;to the unexplained early death of the Chief Inspector. William John Hamilton, was found last Thursday in the death of Mark Street in the apartment of a woman, which is possibly to Hamilton's secret lover is, missing from the woman previously eliminate any trace, the police, at this time, no statements about the cause of death, Fremdeinwirken was not. Information which relates to the elucidation of the crime or persons involved to be taken contrary to any local police station. Hamilton leaves a wife, a son (27) and two daughters (23 & 7). "
you think of Karen and Emma, and you vomit rises in my throat up, you pull yourself together and rinse with coffee. The mushroom soup, though good in taste, it does not make you just easier.
you crumple up the newspaper, and pay your bill and when you want out the door, you fall Clarissa around the neck and once again expressed condolences with tears, you liberate yourself from their grip, and do you say thank you on the way to the Towers.
enters a quarter of an hour later you have the shrouded with the smell of wet tobacco bar Towers Hotels you see a well-built blonde at the bar, the rest of the audience acts like extras and is completely absorbed in his respective alcoholic beverages. Just when you ansteuerst the bar, a waiter come to you to
"Mr. Hamilton? This way please. "
and you follow him.
He brings you to a table in a dark corner of the bar in uncomfortable proximity to the toilet, you sit down for the second time today Dave Morrow opposite.
"Eric, I'm so sorry."
"It has to do not you sorry Uncle Dave, unless you have him killed."
Uncle Dave his left eyebrow clears, after a short pause, he pushes an envelope across the table and says " That's all I have. "
You take the envelope and stuck it in his coat pocket
" Thanks Dave. "
Detective Inspector Dave Morrow nods to you, emptied his glass and left the bar through a side door behind the kitchen.
You stand up, take control of the direction of blonde sit on the bar stool next to her, order a beer and a whiskey, you say "And the lady next I get the same one more time. "
You turn around to see her and smile to your face Wendys.
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